echoes of Esther

"for such a time as this"

and what, Lord, does this mean?

I am in a transitory position

neither here nor there

still struggling to comprehend

the recent past

while simultaneously trying to plan

a too-quickly approaching future

so what position have I come to

that You would say

"for such a time as this"?

yet at every stage in my life

I have complained of being in-between

without solid knowledge of

where I am or where I'm going

but isn't that life?

I claim to travel a dark path

carrying a Flashlight that reveals

only just the next footfall

and my immediate surroundings

perhaps I should stop

to gaze around every so often

perhaps then I would know where I stood

that God should say

"for such a time as this"

upside-down

Perhaps Judas never meant for Jesus to die. Perhaps his idea of turning the world upside-down involved overthrowing the Roman government, and Jesus wasn't acting fast enough for his impatience. If something angered Jesus enough, like the vendors in the temple, He might finally take up arms and claim His rightful place as king.

But Jesus had higher plans, greater aspirations, achieved through humbler means. Judas expected force; Jesus had no need of it. Jesus already ruled--rules--everything. Everything. And so, He came not for Himself, but for His children.

When Judas realized this, that all he'd believed to be true was completely false, he felt great remorse. He had betrayed his Lord to death, and it caused him such agony that he sought death himself.

We all have a bit of Judas in us, much as we scorn the one "who betrayed Him." Impatience, misunderstanding, sin. Human traits. Jesus forgives.